is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Randomize