she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Randomize
