im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
