Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
