Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.

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(517): View more from Michigan

New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause

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(763): View more from Minnesota

she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle

(612): View more from Minnesota

safety first

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(301): View more from Maryland

I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?

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(330): View more from Ohio

As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.

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(937): View more from Ohio

Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.

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(954): View more from Florida

She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion

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(212): View more from New York

My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside

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