Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
Randomize
