Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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