I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
