Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
You may now shotgun with the bride
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
