yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize
