I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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