you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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