should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
