..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Randomize
