I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Randomize
