Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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