great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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