You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
But I just had this pork p�t�. It was dick grabbing.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Randomize
