Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
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