I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
