i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
