Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
They took my balls.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
