I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
