4 words: hood of his car
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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