I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
