And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
Every concussion has its silver lining
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Randomize
