HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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