When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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