i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
