is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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