Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I just want nice things and good sex
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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