You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
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