i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
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