Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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