Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize