Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Randomize
