Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
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