4 words: hood of his car
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
