why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize
