i barfeds in our rink
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
