He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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