halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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