Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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