I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
either way he was missing a nipple.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
Randomize
