what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
