I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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