It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
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