brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
