Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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