it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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